Dead Clown Barbecue

Dead Clown Barbecue
Author: Jeff Strand
Synopsis: A man who finds a severed nose on a plate on his dining room table. A bell that can summon Satan (maybe). Casual Fridays at work that get out of control. A cheery outlook on the post-apocalyptic landscape. The final thoughts of a doomed skydiver. A girl punished by having to share a bed with her grandmother’s corpse. Revenge via baking a tarantula into a cake. A shocking look at where those awful computer-generated book covers come from. And the lost tale of Fangboy.
These are only a few of the demented stories in DEAD CLOWN BARBECUE, a collection of thirty gleefully macabre tales, seven of which were written just for this collection. There’s even a brand new one about a ventriloquist dummy. Those things creep you out, right? You’ll laugh. You’ll scream. probably won’t actually scream, unless you already had issues before you started reading, but you might cringe and get a little spooked.
Publisher: Dark Regions Press

"They can take away my freedom. They can take away my arm. They can take away my life. But they won't take away my smile until they eat my lips."

Jeff Strand brings us another collection of comedic horror in Dead Clown Barbecue, filled with 29 short stories that do not disappoint. I found each of the stories unique and innovative and many were burst out laughing funny. 

The introduction. The Introduction! It was perfect.  We get Strand humor right off the bat, with a side of marital bliss.  

Pett Senmuteary: Oh, poor Tipsy. This story tells of the joys of living by the Pet Cemetery and wanting to please your wife.

Comeuppance: Curse you Tom Booth! Destroyer of mediocre men!

The Apocalypse Ain't So Bad: An optimist and the apocalypse.

The Bell...FROM HELL!!: "Love conquers all, but in a pinch, you can fake it."

Work/Life Balance: With freedom comes great responsibility.

Stop Stabbing Me: Wanna play a game?

Eight-Legged Vengeance: Please do not ever bake a spider into a cake.

The Drop: What would you think about if your parachute didn't open while sky diving?

Here's What Happened...: Who ordered the turkey sandwich?

Pregnancy Test: If pee sticks could talk...

Mr. Twitcher's Miracle Baby-Chopping Machine: Stand up for what you believe in!

The Carver: Want to hear a joke?

Push the Button: Would you push a button to collect $1,000,000 but someone you didn't know would have to die?

My Knife Collection: Serial killer caught by serial killer

Drain Bamage: Do NOT drop the baby!

Gramma's Corpse: You better study harder.

Burden: Please remember to always wear your seat belt.

Rough Draft: More notes than story. Cute concept.

Fangboy and the Troll: Here, eat this.

Dead in the Water: Zombies and a jet ski.

Immunity: Getting bit, with a twist.

The Big Bite: 65 foot vampire!
Specimen 313: Feed me Seymour!

We Believe: Grandma got ran over by a reindeer.

Poor Career Choice: If you're going to put out a hit, pay more than $50.

True Hero: 

Chomp (A Cautionary Tale): Ha, ha! You lost an arm!

The Severed Nose:

Dummy: I'm a real boy!

Overall score: 105/140 3.75 rounded up to 4!

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